“Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else’s opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation.”
– Oscar Wilde
Our world is probably full of people who seemingly haven’t a clue how others really see them. But, of course, the real question is whether that’s also true of you. Or, in my case, me. Perhaps we’re no better when it comes to intrapersonal awareness.
So, Why is that?
- “Unless I know, How do I manage?”
We generally don’t even know that ‘what’ we don’t know. So it becomes really difficult to manage ourselves.
- Not enough Intrapersonal feedback as we grow
From the people around us, we don’t normally get enough feedback about us as a person. People generally tell us what we want to hear and not what we need to hear.
- Lack of Introspection
Think for a minute, if you suddenly get some unexpected free time during a day, what would you do with that time?
Your answer generally would be sleeping, going out, pursuing some hobby, watching TV, talking to someone, or, maybe whatever the next thing was on your to-do list. How many of us actually spend some time introspecting our life, our choices?
- “Why me?”
Even if we get to know some things about ourselves, acceptance of those things is quite difficult for us. We always go with ‘Why me?’ attitude rather than accepting the consequences of our choices.
- ‘Imposter syndrome’
We always compare ‘the best of others’ to the ‘worst of ourselves’. On social media, we see everyone accomplishing things, being happy, etc which further weighs us down. And there’s this component of self-doubt as well where we doubt our achievements as ‘fluke’ and are always afraid of being ‘found out’.
- ‘What’s the Destination?’
We generally don’t know ‘where to’ go. And because of that life feels purposeless which brings sadness into life.
- Way ahead not clear
Even if we manage to know where to go, the next problem is ‘How to’ go and that’s why we feel stuck.
- Seeking self-knowledge
We generally avoid this, but if we introspect properly and seek awareness about ourselves, we’ll progress better in life.
- Directly asking others
There are certain people in life whom we trust and can count on that they’ll provide us with true feedback. We should directly ask them about ourselves whenever we have a doubt. The answer might be harsh, but you never know that a harsh answer is what you might need at that moment.
“Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.”